Finding the YOU in YOUrself

Ten years ago, I had the biggest fight of my life. I felt a fabled pain that you get when you are unable to be connected with yourself;
I fought with “The All Mighty authority, The Ultimate Father of all”.
I threw all my toys out of the pram (at the age of 29) and said to God…
“That you have sent me to this planet and did not teach me anything! You have to come at once and hold my hand and teach me how to do this life. You have to teach me how to be connected with yourself and do this life. ”
This sounds a bit dramatic, but it is true.

The background was that I had been living in the UK for seven years all by myself. As known by all (who find themselves in this same position), one has to be highly self-independent to live in the UK.
Yet I had not one single soul I could fall back to.
In other words, I felt completely broken and empty inside and I was in urgent need to be connected with myself and ultimately the source (divine energy/GOD).

I was trying hard to keep the balance between my career and my life: also trying to find someone to create a divine relationship with who I could build a family with. It was very important to me that he was truly authentic and a great leader in his own right. This is an I envisioned to be the kind of person I wanted desired to come home to after a long day of adventures and lessons that life had to teach me. I wanted to share all my experiences with him a kindred spirit like that.

In other words, I felt completely broken and empty inside and I was in urgent need to be connected with myself and ultimately the source (divine energy/GOD).

It was a difficult time. I could not find a way to fill the emptiness and brokenness I felt in my heart from any of the materialistic objects that I had earned the privilege to provide myself with.
I was failing. I had so much I wanted to learn and grow up too to but no one to teach me how to or fall back on (from a supportive, loving nurturing capacity).
When you realise all the external objects do not bring you ultimate peace and happiness, by default one starts to look within. When you start to look at you also start to become self-dependent of anything that is outside of yourself.

My biggest challenge was to learn that I(we) can create on my(our) own a life of self-dependence which eventually leads to you(us) to become(becoming) interdependence (but we will explore this topic another time).
The problem was not that I could not be independent, but that I did not know this fact about my existence at that time – there was a gap in my cognition and consciousness – a blindspot.

The journey to be connected with your(one’s)self…
Growing up in India and living a very sheltered life in a patriarchal society did not help me to develop certain faculties until a very late age. Then moving when I moved to the UK and I put myself up for jobs in the technology sector that I had no formal training or skills for. In hindsight, it was one of the reasons that I felt so exhausted as I had to learn so many new things to learn every day. Plus, little did I know I did not know until 4 years ago that I was am dyslexic.

Even though I was 29 years old when I initially did ask for help. at that time I was an extremely ambitious, and hard working woman in the technology industry in a corporate world,… but deep inside of myself, I was really living as a 16-year-old girl.

Now looking back at my life, I can’t help but smile at the innocence of this little girl inside of me.
(I’ve learned to) love her unconditionally and (in so doing) protect her heart, her dreams and her aspirations for her life because that little girl is a source of my power I use to run my life on today.
Though it was cacophonic all around I had peered (within) in. Once you are successful, you discover a solace within. It is then you feel the need to be connected with yourself.
Even though this little girl was extremely gullible, she had an exceptional courage and purity that this adult version of me could ever (never?) reach. (without the dual-existence of her too)
She is truly an inspirational facet of me for this adult version of ME, and I have (learnt to harness) drawn sheer power from her.
It is the same purity you can find in children. The spark, the zeal which goes missing with the span of time. As you grow older you fail to remain connected with yourself and that is when complications (set in) come in. (and present themselves).

The Process on How To Be Connected With Yourself…
This is my intention and a gift for the world: here I will give you ways to open your heart and truly be connected with yourself this new year.
No matter how much positive energy you try to create the circumstances in the (this) world is (are) such that it’s not conducive to allow us (for us to) to stay in touch with our hearts.
When I talk about the heart I talk about the subtle energy that lies (exists) at the (very) core of our being. The energy that drives in arises in us day after day. The energy that stems from hope. The energy that makes us human.
It shrivels up even by witnessing the slightest brutal action, let alone if we ourselves were responsible for generating any brutal energy towards any other being; or even more importantly, towards our own self.
You see one of the reasons, why a majority of people’s hearts are closed is that we are all experiencing constant violence at some level. You have to be connected with yourself to stop that. and shield yourself from it. Once you unearth the potential to be connected with yourself you will discover your true purpose and focus on fulfilling the same.

If the energy of violence has not come from the outside, we will create it on the inside of our being. Just by creating a thought alone of any sort of brutality or violence will keep our hearts closed. You have to fight that to be connected with yourself.
Be Connected With Yourself: A Journey to Bliss
We have to understand that whatever is my input, will be the output.
What I output will return to me, (as is the property of energy. “Whatever I give, I get back.”) This cycle continues until I awaken myself to it and consciously break this cycle taking a chance to be connected with yourself used to believe that it is harder for men to open their hearts than women.
But after deep observations and personal reflections, I have found that it is just as hard for women of this day and age to open their hearts
However, it is important to be connected with yourself to make the world a better place.
How do you know if your heart is open or closed?
If your heart is closed, you will find discomfort in your body and the energy will be blocked, and it will manifest in different ways to create more discomfort in your life.
If you work to be connected with yourself, your heart is open you will find that you will be able to take everything in your stride. Life will be lighter, regardless of your external situations.
This is why you will be able to turn around any circumstances to your benefit. The power to be connected with yourself is such.
I feel this is a pure type of selfishness that the world really needs to learn. This is because you are not blaming anyone externally. You are trying to be connected with yourself as an answer to the pains in the world. (external world).

When you find yourself in any turbulence, instead of changing anything outside of yourself, first get busy with adjusting your inner state by trying to be connected with yourself.
Instead of fighting aimlessly; you focus on unblocking the dark energy that has shadowed your heart.
Thus you can break the vicious cycle of negative energy and elevate your being and consequently others around you.

You have made an effort to understand and experiment with the law of energy, “what I give, I get back.” I can’t repeat this enough times.
I have to admit that, this is by far the most delicious thing I have ever experienced in life. There is a lot of power when you are able to be connected with yourself. You open a whole new channel of hopes.
When I break the cycle of involuntary thoughts in the subconscious mind (that I had created in my logical or analytical brain) I am taken upwards, almost in a spiral, wow!!!
It is magical and so worth the effort you put in to be connected with yourself.
I see this practice growing in time, and wise men and women will adopt it sooner or later.
I highly recommend if you wish to live a full life, along with learning about the scientific inventions, business models or the other universes outside milky way etc. etc. to spend your time learning about your core nature.

What are your strengths or weaknesses?
How does your inner being operate in different situations?…

Almost every day we hear about one or other natural disasters or man-made catastrophes.
If you were a witness of one, once in your lifetime, you would give up as soon as it struck unless you try to be connected with yourself.
I literally mean would you accept death before it even arises, or would you find the courage to pick yourself back-up and along with others around you and survive thus surviving and thriving and thrive in the end?
Once you understand how to be connected with yourself you will become resilient to most earthly felt emotions and pains.
If you stay tuned in to yourself, I promise you that you will know the right thing to do, at the right time.
The price you pay to stand strong in the face of adversity is a daily practice of staying still
Give yourself at least 20 mins twice for this practice; this will be the most worthwhile time you will spend invest in YOUR your life.
I have shared this little girl’s story in the hope that it may also help you to be connected re-connected with yourself in 2018.
also hope for you that you also hope that you experience this most delicious energy, that emanates and manifests within when your heart soars and opens; connected connecting you to the purity were to that purity when you understand the divine power and strength to be gained from the strengths to be connected with yourself. connecting to your true self –  YOURSELF.